A Real Blog Then... about Evil Marquees

 So...
Catch you up with what you will be hearing a huge amount about in the next little while.
My dear Minister passed away last Sat. I loved him... pehaps I should say that I love him as we know we'll meet again...

 And so I'm grieving, really. Like all that stuff I've studied on stages of Grief, and all that - I'm observing in my own life, watching my brain roll around between times of anger, deperssion, acceptance... perhaps even denial - and just letting it run with it. Its at times terrifying to see what's going on up thereat times its extremely amusing... like today...

So I pull up to the church, and see the big marquee (which has been set up for the funeral), and I hate it. Its evil. The great evil of our time... my brain has come up with ways of burning down that marquee or slashing it with knives til its in threads. Seriously. Evil Marquee. I hate the marquee and I'm so angry with it.

I know people say this is normal. I think I might have just slipped off my perch... I'm seeing evil marquees. Little paranoid schizophrenia perhaps?

On a sadder note, I then walk into Kingsleys office, and see all the orders of service - and inside a letter from Jess. A beautiful letter mind you. At the end of it she quotes a verse from Isaiah which was given to King by a friend and which brought him so much comfort as he suffered.

“In repentance and rest is your salvation,
   in quietness and trust is your strength..."

One of my life verses. A verse that has reared its head and been given to me over and over again. A verse that I strive to follow as each of those things on it are things that I long for in my walk with God... quietness, rest, trust... and I struggle with. A verse that I have claimed as one of 'mine' from ealry on as a Christian.

And here it is again. I'm not sure if it comforts me or mocks me... either way it hurts. Is God letting me know that he was around? Or is God rapping me over the knuckles showing me how very badly I have failed in those areas.
Or is it perhaps a complete coincidence and I'm just so ridiculously oversenstive at the moment that everything is all about me.
Most likely the third option.

So I'm not so angry. Unless that marquee billows in the wind one more time... then I might kill it.